Kimberly Steinhoff January 12, 2022 Parenting
Divorce and separation are difficult not only for the child but also for the parents. It is important that the parents do all they can to make the transition as seamless and easy as possible. Parents should try and work together if possible to create a single parenting plan so it is created in the child`s best interests. Courts will mostly accept a plan upon which both parents agree and have cooperated on.
Another key issue in making a joint custody parenting plan work is proximity to the other parent. When children have to shuffle between households frequently, it leaves them feeling unsettled, distracted and conflicted. You both can minimize those feelings by remaining in close proximity to each other and to your children`s schools and friends. When transitions between homes are smooth and conflict-free, joint custody can benefit children.
The parents should also consider the nature and temperament of their children. If a child is very close to one parent and wants to live with that parent, the child may need to move with that parent. Sometimes that is for the best. Depending on the age of the children, the parents can get input about what the children would like to happen. They can set up different arrangements for each of their children if that is necessary. The parents should listen to their children, but in the end they should act in the best way they see fit.
There was an interesting article in Science Daily posted on August 21, 2013 titled; "Grandmothers Who Raise Their Grandkids Struggle With Depression, Study Suggests," which actually makes a lot of sense, parenting is a huge stress, and older people around younger people all the time makes them feel old, unwanted, too slow, and out of touch.
If the other parent refuses to cooperate on the agreement and insists on going to court, a parent should make every effort to prepare for court and get their parenting agreement accepted. The parent can suggest going to mediation to work things out beforehand, and some states even require that parents attend custody mediation before going to court. However, if things still do not work out, the parent should make a parenting agreement and be prepared to fully explain why this agreement is in the best interest of the children. They should give adequate time to both parents and make the parenting time schedule fair. This will help the court see that this parent is trying to do what is best for the child and increase the chances of the agreement being accepted. Hopefully, things can be resolved in the best way for the children.
When two people divorce and wish to lead separate lives, it becomes much more complicated when children are involved. Divorcing parents should have the same goal-to be as involved in their children`s lives as possible and to provide them with stable, effective parenting. Joint custody is one way to achieve that goal, but can it work for your family?